8 Temmuz 2017 Cumartesi

A letter to Bill Gates...




Dear Bill,

Thanks to you, the world has reached an incredible place with regard to computers and technology. In the beginning, we had a hard time getting used to the mouse, but these days we feel rather comfortable with it, and we don’t know what we would do if it were not for the right click. Life has become so easy. Students, teachers, academicians, businessmen, designers, and housewives: everyone loves to “copy and paste.’’  

I am not sure whether you play the telephone game in your country, but we love to play this game nationally. We have a good laugh comparing what the first whisperer and the last say. This is very much like the copy-paste business. You never know what sort of changes take place between the original author and the one who copied it. Yet, we never laugh at this Bill, we love these short cuts. Bless you Bill, for saving us from “reading books” and “writing”.

Following the invention of the Internet, the weight has been off our minds as a family. Now I can find all the necessary information about my job, and I am able to prepare my presentations easily on the night before. Not that I know any of the people who also share the same information like me, but you can’t imagine how everyone is so generous and unselfish.

My wife now copies recipes from the Internet and prepares delicious dishes for us. As you can imagine, she is also in good spirits. She often expresses her gratitude to you. Although there is occasional confusion with the measurements, we have no real complaints. When I say confusion, this is actually a bit of an exaggeration; just things like adding salt to the rice pudding. She apparently made a mistake when copying the recipe. This is normal, Bill. My wife feels so relaxed now, because she doesn’t have to worry about what to cook anymore. This has also comforted the whole family. 

By the way, your children have grown up. How wonderful! My son is in 6th grade and he brings home a lot of research homework. It wouldn’t be wrong to say that my wife and I have started school again. Did you know that they now call homework ‘performance’? 

Do you remember Bill, the old days, how much effort we made to complete assignments? We used to go to libraries, read books, conduct research and come up with a few pages of summary. Those were difficult times. You liked reading though. In the end you have built a giant technology empire with limited resources of those days and became one of the wealthiest men in the world. I wonder what you would do if you were a student in today’s conditions.

Yes, Bill, they have changed the name for homework; it is ‘performance task’ now. However, it feels like it is not my son’s performance, but mine that is measured. I don’t quite understand how, but the rascal is quite self-indulgent, so I’m trying to help him out a little. It takes about 15 minutes for us to reach the information and complete the task, or a maximum of half an hour, if pictures are required. 

May God bless you, Bill! Believe me, we all pray for you. Our lives have become so easy and we have a lot more free time. This is so good; I can watch more football games, and my wife is on Facebook all day sharing ideas, pictures and other things with her friends. She has become a genuine philosopher. I have no idea where she gets all those words from, but she has improved herself tremendously. She sometimes shares cooking photos, as well, although she hasn’t tried any of those dishes yet I believe that we will be tasting them very shortly. They look magnificent!

My son is also happy, too, when assignments are completed quickly. He disappears into his room in the evening. We see neither hide nor hair of him. This computer thing has done him good. The other day I was curious about what he was up to. He was apparently playing a war strategy game. I think he will become a bureaucrat and become a vital part of our country’s foreign affairs office. I was, in fact, a little tense when I heard that it was a war game. I was afraid that he would learn about violence, but then I was relieved when he said, “No Dad, we don’t actually kill.’’

Bill, we are grateful to you for the change you have made in our lives.  We are certainly proud of your achievements. Our family has adopted your famous quote ‘’I always select the lazy ones for the hardest tasks because they always solve the most difficult problem with the simplest methods.’’ Now that we have become idle enough, we are waiting for your phone call.

With love

Your friend,
Ömer Orhan

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